Owyn had a bad day yesterday after school. Some naughty behavior came out, I got very angry, and Owyn lost a favorite privilege - his Wii - for a few weeks. He was very sad, but I wasn't sure that he really understood the magnitude of what he did. Did he even remember what he did?
Today, Owyn was playing with a neighbor boy, and somehow it came out that Owyn lost his Wii. Here is what I heard:
Owyn: (all said very matter-of-factly, without taking a breath) My Wii is in the attic because I lost it yesterday. My mom was going to give it to my friend Joe, but we agreed to put it in the attic instead and I can't have it back until the end of September.
Friend: What did you do?
Owyn: I knocked over the chocolates in the library yesterday (note - I know this sounds like a small thing, but it was a much longer story)
Friend: Why?
Owyn: I don't know. I just did. And now I don't have my Wii anymore.
And that was that. They went on to play.
Now I know that he remembers what he did wrong, but I'm still not sure he understands why it was wrong. I do know that I made him apologize to the other parties involved, and that I gave a consequence and followed through with it. My punishment however, as a friend later said to me, "did not match the crime".
So I now apologize to my son if the punishment was too severe for the crime. I am still trying to figure out what consequences are appropriate for you, what is going on inside your brain when you make some of the choices you make, and how a good Mother should respond to said choices. I know we still have a lot to learn, but never doubt that I love you.
No comments:
Post a Comment